Please don’t admit anyone- The hospitals cannot cope: Part 3

Crisis?What Crisis?

This isn't the first time, nor the second time that this situation has come to our attention.

GPs in Southampton received this e-mail:-

“Dear Colleagues,

I have been asked to inform you urgently that Southampton University Hospital Trust is currently on ‘Black Alert’ with Ambulances queuing outside A/E and the Ambulance Service [SCAST] indicating that there is a 1.5 hour wait for even urgent requests for ambulances to be dealt with.

Clearly in this difficult situation we would request wherever possible that if measures can be taken by you to avoid hospital admission or A/E attendance for patients we would be most grateful.

I am conscious that communications of this nature are often deemed unhelpful, but I hope that you will take this circumstance into consideration, in consultation with patients and carers, in informing your clinical decisions this afternoon.”

Now, firstly you need to know that the only type of alert over and above a “black” one is a full-scale Major Incident: the sort of thing that happens when there is a plane crash or a pile up on the motorway, or indeed, a railway accident- all of which could so easily happen near to Southampton.

So, the discerning reader might ask him or herself what disaster happened on this day? Did we miss something in the papers? Was there an earthquake? Was it mid-winter? No dear reader, this is mid- May. You are not hallucinating. There is NO flu epidemic, no SARS and no accidents over and above normal.

This is what happens when you leave the control of a public service to the ignorant pool of dripping cunt-slime that consists of politicians (of both parties). All these vermin can think of is closing beds. Even the noble Lord Darzi seems to be intent on the same. One is also left pondering what exactly GPs are supposed to do when confronted with messages like this.

Do people think we drive around the streets looking for old people whose shoe laces are undone so we can send them into hospital between our endless rounds of golf? No, our patients are so shit-scared of going into these mediaeval cesspools of MRSA and C Diff, that they have to be knocking on death’s fucking door before they will let us send them there. Of course, in sensible Western Countries like France and Germany, they know that an efficient hospital functions best at about 90% capacity so that there is time to sterilize the mattress between one admission and the next.

In the UK, which, under El Gordo, now spends as much on health as some of these countries, the hospitals are usually running at over 100%, with the beds still warm from the previous corpse when the next lucky “customer” gets to lie in it. “How can this be?” you no unreasonably ask yourself. Maybe it has something to do with the gargantuan monetary waste spent on the bloated corpse of paper- shufflers and meeting-attenders, who, like an obscene inverted pyramid, sit on top of the doctors and nurses who try to run the service? Some of these, in the form of the local PCT, were the same fucktards who decided not to pay GPs for doing minor injuries: their strategy of using their walk-in-centres and A&E seems to have backfired on them fairly spectacularly. Only a Nu-Labour organisation like the NHS could spend more money on management consultants than clinical consultants.

Pandemic Flu, anyone?