Frank has gone missing........

This latest entry of Dr Rant was smuggled into Rant central offices by someone calling himself only ‘Mr Davis’. We have no idea where Frank currently is.

Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

Cuntslime. Utter, lying, vexatious cuntslime. That what Nu fucking Labour are. I don’t know where I am, save for the fact that two Nu Labour stormtroopers have thrown me into what looks rather like a cell. When I demanded to see my lawyer, they murmured something about a 41-day wait. So, here I am, dressed in Guantanamo orange, with an arsehole like a hula-hoop, having had a cavity search from someone with bigger hands than the local orthopaedic surgeon. And all I did was sign a petition.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

So, the BMA have finally grown some balls. Tiny ones, almost like shrivelled-up sultanas, but testicles, never the less. They have organised a petition to campaign against polyclinics, a proposal by Lord Darsehole so monumentally fucking stupid that even capitalist groups such as the King’s fund recognise that they won’t work. The argument is astonishingly simple. With a finite amount of money available, and a limited number of trained GPs, if you build a large number of brand shiny new buildings, and fill them with GPs, then the GPs and the money are going to have to come from somewhere else.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

So, unless the government suddenly finds a huge sum of money from somewhere (it ain’t going to be the national gold reserves, or Northern Rock), or finds a large number of foreign GPs willing to work for peanuts (maybe, but they’ve all pissed off following MTAS), then something is going to have to give. Yup, local GP surgeries will be shut, and the money used for polyclinics. So, with their newfound bollocks, the BMA organised a campaign : Support Your Surgery. This audacious campaign made the following wild and outrageous demands : Spend money on improving existing GP services rather than polyclinics, and to stop private companies taking over GP surgeries.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

In just two weeks, the BMA collected well over a million signatures from patients. One in sixty people in the UK signed it, in only 14 days. One would have to assume that means that the public recognise polyclinics for the crock-of-shite that they are. And what happened when the BMA released the results of the petition? Well, the government moaned like a French whore taking it up the arse. Rent-a-gobshite Ben Bradshaw, of whom Dr Rant has written plenty about before, was wheeled up to come up with the typical Nu Labour spin that we are all sick to the back teeth of.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

And that spin showed that Nu Labour are frightened. Bradshaw said that the BMA campaign was ‘misleading and mendacious in nature’, as he shat his Y-fronts. He told the BBC that he was disappointed that the BMA was ‘opposing investment and painting a distorted picture of what it would mean’ as his bladder dribbled piss down his leg. And he pointed out his concern over the ‘misleading and inaccurate statements’ that the BMA had made, as he quivered in the sort of terror that bullies get when they realise that the whole school playground is about to give them an utter fucking kicking.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

And eventually, Gordon Brown, the clunk-jawed dictator was wheeled out, clearly annoyed that his plans to turn Britain into a police state had been disturbed by a million people writing to him. The corpulent Cyclops chortled his disapproval. ‘The issue is about increasing access to primary care, not replacing GPs’, he grunted. Right. So just where the fucking fuck are the polyclinic staff going to come from? ‘We want GPs to be open for longer hours and at weekends’ he demanded petulantly. Who does? Not 86% of the electorate, Gordo. ‘And if that is not possible, we want to provide other source of care’ he postured. Which is, dear reader, known as privatising the NHS.

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

The state-run media, know as the BBC (Bradshaw’s former employer) was happy to blast out that ‘Brown bashes GPs’ on the airwaves, in between announcing that some thick, ugly bloke had won the Apprentice. However, everyone who isn’t brainwashed realises that this shameless dribble of cuntphlegm is a transparent scheme for back-door privatisation. Even the Times newspaper realised just how utterly crap the scheme is. But will Nu Labour listen? Will they pay attention to over a million people, to a hundred thousand doctors and even the King’s fund? Of course not. In fact the only public body to support the existence of polyclinics was the NHS confederation, a body of NHS managers, whom if told by Gordon Brown ‘I am going to shit a massive steaming turd up your nostrils’ would reply ‘certainly Sir. Would you like to use my left one first?’

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Property of HMP. Now wash your hands

Nu Labour are out to wreck the country. They are out to privatise the NHS. They will ensure that large parts of the NHS are run by private companies. And this will be their retirement plan. Because you can bet that for every private company who runs part of the former national health service, there will be an ex Nu Labour minister on board. The current government are evil control freaks. They will take away your right to free health. They will call the most trusted profession in the country liars. They will take away your liberty. They will imprison you for 42 days without telling you why, while they tell the public that you are a terrorist. And all the time, they look for more groups to accuse of being such ‘terrorists’. And I would like to write more, but I really need a shit, and am running out of paper. So, lots of love, and yours truly,

Frank. x

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